Update on my life.

I realize it has been quite a while since i've updated on my family, life and school. So here it goes..

I am absolutely amazed with how much God has transformed my life and my family in the past year. There is seriously a night and day difference compared to this time last year. A little over a year ago, I found out what a REAL relationship with God is supposed to be at Crooked Creek and my life since has not been the same. With my family, relationships that I never thought would EVER exist are starting to form. Mark and my mom are doing so so so good and it is amazing to see how the Lord is continuing to do work in their lives. This time last year, i was cussing him out and telling him how much I hate him. Now we sit together at church and at dinner, talking about everything. Yes it is still a little weird, but we're making progress. Building relationships takes time and I'm willing to be patient. My brother and I are still living with our grandparents and I will be starting my sophomore year of college in 2 weeks. It's really freaking me out how fast we're growing up. The thought of school really stresses me out, but I am so excited to get back and to see how the Lord is going to work through Young Life and another organization called Cure that I am apart of.

and that's about all in my life that would be remotely interesting..

Day 9 & 10

           This morning we watched the sunrise over Mount Kenya, which was incredible. I love seeing God’s beauty through the Earth He created. We then left Sweet Water and drove 4 hours to Nairobi. We stayed at the mall in Nairobi for a few hours and this is where I was able to meet Francis, the child I sponsor through Compassion. I was literally freaking out before I met him trying to figure out where he was and what was going on. He was very shy, but I really enjoyed meeting him. I gave him a soccer ball and some coloring books, which he absolutely loved and we were able to color together. When we left the mall, we headed straight to the airport. Another really tough part of the trip was having to tell Alfred goodbye. We all prayed over him before we left and then said our goodbye’s. Just another time I was able to break down. All week he referred to me as his “little sis”. I will never forget being able to have my first conversations in Swahili with him. It amazes me the love he has for the Lord. It shines from him and everyone around him is able to tell.

            We are now on the way home and I seriously cannot express how much this trip has meant to me. I now know that I am called to serve and that He has placed a special place in my heart for serving and for Kenya. I pray that things will work out so that I can return there very soon. This trip has taught me many different things and I know the Lord is going to continue to reveal different things to me as time goes on. One thing I had been praying before I went on the trip was for God to “break my heart for what breaks His.” God revealed to me in so many ways that His heart doesn’t break because these people don’t have a lot of possessions and that they don’t have a lot of money. His heart breaks for those that are lost. He wants to see salvation in Kenya, in America and through the whole world. No the Kenyans don’t have a lot of money and no they don’t have food sometimes, but they joy and passion they have for the Lord is so much greater than you could ever imagive. They possess so much more than we do because of the stronger faith that they have. Not all of the Kenyans are saved, actually very few of them are, but the ones who do know Jesus, let it shine. I hope and pray for the day the Lord brings me back to Africa, but until then I hope my life is never the same and that I will shine His light in every way possible. I am so thankful for the time I was able to spend in this country. 

Day 8

What a day it has been. We started the day off with our last morning devotion as a group. We discussed how we should plant seeds and whether or not we saw something immediately, we were still apart of something huge. We left the hotel and went to visit one primary and one secondary school to see the progress they had made. Soon after, we headed to Ereri to have our goodbye ceremony. When we got there, the children were all in class and the land was set up the same way as the welcome ceremony. The elders were still digging the trench. The kids sat in the center and we surrounded the outside of the circle. The ceremony consisted of the traditional dances, the same way the welcome ceremony began. Once the dancing ended, Crispo introduced the leaders of the school, the Pastor’s and our leader, Jason. We all introduced ourselves and then the head lady over all the schools stood to speak. She brought me straight to tears. She thanked us and explained to us the difference we were making at Ereri. She also told us how we weren’t helping Ereri by the amount of things we possessed or the money we had, but we were making a difference by our willingness to serve and to come across the country to make a change and spread the name of Jesus. It was overwhelming. She then released one of the teachers who started Ereri and introduced the new teacher that was going to take his place. Jason, Jermile and Trish spoke to tell them how much they impacted our lives and th chance it made in our hearts. We then sang Asante Sana Yesu for the people of Ereri. I could not contain myself, the tears came rolling. After Jason prayed, the ceremony ended and the people opened up the market for us. Eunice and Teresia both gave me necklaces as a present. I tried my hardest to shop as fast as I could so that I could see my kids. I found Esther as fast as I could and she immediately started crying because she did not want to leave me. Talk about heart breaking. She introduced me to her mother and it was such a pleasure getting to meet her. Then it was time to say goodbye. I definitely left my heart with those people and Esther is always going to have a special place in my heart. I did not start crying until we passed classes 1 and 2 and all the kids came running to the window yelling “Rafiki” which means friend. It was such a tough day to say goodbye to all of the people of Ereri. We then went to Sweet Water tented camps for the night, which was definitely a nice treat and a good way to bring us back to reality of how we really live. 

Day 7

2 salvation's yesterday and 2 today. God is good.
I am so sad that this is our last work day. I honestly feel like i am at home here and i do not want to leave. Today was SUCH a good day. we arrived at Ereri today and i was very excited about getting to work in the school again. Before we went into the classrooms, I went back to help in the trench for a while. Instead of working with the women, today i worked with the Masai men. I had no way to communicate with them because they did not speak swahili and they continued to laugh and talk about me the entire time i tried to work. but by the end of the digging, I met Moses and they taught me a few Masai words. I left to go to the school and today we taught the story of Jesus feeding the 5,000 with 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread. The kids really had a hard time understanding this story but the coloring and the singing went well. When we left the school, we headed back to the trench to find out one of the women had been hit in the arm with a machete. The people told us that she simply tore part of her skirt, wrapped it around her arm and was ready to start back working, but when Trish saw her arm she refused to let her keep working. Trish proceeded to help her clean up her arm and Crispo gave her 25 shillings to go get stitches. The woman left the trench and walked 4-6 kilometers (between 3 or 4 miles) to go to the hospital. In America, we sprain an ankle and we're out of work for a week. Their work ethics and their determination are such an inspiration to me. We left the trench and went back to play with the kids, but today was a lot more calm than usual. Today instead of running around with the kids, we just walked and talked and sang. Worshiping with these kids is indescribable.

We left Ereri early that afternoon and took a tour of the other schools to see the way God has used 410Bridge and NewSpring in the communities. At Black Tank, one little girl Jacquelyn latched on to me as soon as we arrived and cried her eyes out as we left. Her crying her eyes out was not precious, but she was adorable. Just another child on my list to go back and see!

Day 6

Today was another work day at Ereri primary school. We started our morning with jamming to the lion king soundtrack on the bus ride, it fit perfectly. We arrived to the schools and Trish told us that only 3 people could go into each class and she was going to put one of the people who worked in the trench yesterday in my class, so she needed someone to volunteer somewhere else. Since no one else was volunteering, i reluctantly said i would help in the trench. It was obvious that i was not very happy and it broke my heart that i was not going to be with my girls that I had started becoming so close to. I had also promised the kids that i would see them the next day, but God made everything work out for His good and made me eat my words from earlier that day. I started out my day by sorting rice with the women who work in the kitchen. I then left the kitchen to start digging in the trench. In the trench, i met one of the older boys that i spoke with yesterday's mother. I was able to have a very solid conversation with her and all of the other women. not to mention, it was very cool to talk to all of the older people in swahili! They all asked me about my family and i was once again able to talk about God and how God has been a great father to me and that the best thing to do is trust in Him. All the women had great responses, they smiled and told me how much they loved me and wanted me to come back to Kenya and stay with them. I then helped start digging the trench, which was some HARD work. They would use a pick-ax to chop up the dirt and the ground and then another person would come behind them with a shover and clear out the dirt. After lunch, we all split up into 3 teams and went on house visits. We walked a good mile or two to a community close by and they showed us their huts. The hut is smaller than my room at home and sometimes up to 5 people can live in one. On the way back to Ereri, i turn around and Esther is running after me and all the others. She literally came out of the middle of no where and ran straight to me and grabbed my hand. We walked all the way back to Ereri holding hands, singing "Asante Sana Yesu" "Waka Waka and "Deep Down In My Heart" Moments like this are the ones that meant the most to me.

This little girl stole my heart. Not only did we connect with the fact that we dont have fathers, she has a very similar personality. She followed my every move. If i told one of the other kids to do something or if i had to tell them to stop she would quote me and act like another little teacher. The moments I spent with her, Annah, Ivan and Jacquelyn are moments that will be engrained in my memory. I cannot wait to return and see these children that have a very special place in my heart.

Day 5

God never ceases to amaze me. So many awesome things have taken place in the 3 days that we have been present in Ereri and the Tutu village. Today was the first of our work days at the school and when they say work, they mean work. Today has been both physically and emotionally exhausting. We started off on our our journey to Ereri and God was just really moving in my heart. It was awesome to sit and reflect on these days while listening to worship music and heading to go serve these people. We arrived at the school where hundreds of children were learning and many women and men were hard at work in the kitchen and the field. Our group was split into 3 teams. One to go into the school, one to help dig a trench and the last group were the pastors teaching a pastoral training class. Today, i was on the team working in the school and what a blessing it was. Our main topic for this week is trust and how we are to trust in God. Today's lesson was about Noah and the ark. I was placed with classes 1 and 2 (which would be like k4 and k5 in America) and we had about 80 students total. We taught our lesson showing pictures and telling the story, then proceeded to ask the children questions. Of course with the help of their teacher as our translator. The children were SO respectful and so well behaved. They listened very carefully and understood everything that we taught. After the story, we let the children color and then we taught them the song "Rise and shine and give god the glory glory..". After our tenth round of practicing the song, they stopped us and asked the teacher if they could sing for us. They sang us this:
           "I want to be like Jesus so deep down in my heart, I want to be like Jesus so deep down in my     heart, so deep deep so down down so deep down in my heart."

Seriously, it was so incredible to watch these kids sing to us. We ended with all singing the "Asante Sana Yesu" song once in English and once in Swahili. It is so moving to worship, in two languages, across the world with a completely different culture. When we returned for lunch, the kids were finishing up their lunch and we were able to spend the afternoon playing with them. There were times when i literally had a child hanging off every single one of my fingers. Annah and Esther stuck by my side ALL day long along and then one of the little boys i met the day before at our church service found me and held my hand all day! Brittany and I taught all the kids how to do the hokey-pokey, the chicken dance, and bananas unite chant. The kids loved our dances and taught us one of their own. They shake their hips back and forth and sing "Chiquita banana, chiquita banana.." over and over again. Later in the afternoon I met 4 of the older boys and we got to talking about what God's plan for me looks like and how im trying to be obedient to his calling. One of the boys was talking to me about his life and telling me how he wakes up everyday at 4 in the morning to walk to school! INSANE! i struggle with 8am's. I also was able to show them pictures of my family and introduce them to my friends. They all kept asking where is your dad and i told them that he had passed away. Well later that day, Esther pulled me to the side and told me "Baba yangu alipokufa." Her father had also passed away the week before we arrived in Kenya. This allowed me to really connect with her, I was able to share with her in swahili that we do not have earthly fathers but we do have a heavenly father who promises to take care of us and love us, but we have to trust in His plan for us. I have absolutely loved today. I cannot see what the Lord has in store for us in the next few days.

Day 4

Wow. I cannot even begin to describe how awesome that church service was. It is so cool to worship with these people in different languages and in different ways but all under the same God. Their passion for church and the Lord were absolutely indescribable. The power of the prayers and the preaching were so great. I did not know what they were saying, but oh how the presence of God was apparent. He was there in every aspect of the churst. We started with prayer and speaking which turned to powerful worship. The songs were very lengthy and the people sang with such pride, truly and genuinely worshiping the Father. After the pastor had spoken, Eric was given the chance to preach. He spoke about Joseph and how he was sold into slavery by his brothers. They then asked if any of us wanted to share anything. I volunteered to speak and told them of how my life before I met Christ was broken and I was alone, but God gave me life. I read Isaiah 41:10. It was so very encouraging to see the people respond to me with claps and smiles. All of the others in my group spoke a little and we closed our talks with singing the Asante Sana Yesu (Thank you, Thank you Jesus) song and It is well with my soul. Two more of the villagers spoke and we prayed, sang more songs and took the offering. As we closed, one of the women of the church rose to share with us how we and 410 bridge had helped change her life. One thing i remember most was her telling us that she was so blessed by us and she felt we deserved the best water she had. They walk miles to retrieve water for their families and some days, they have to go without water, but she wanted to give us the best of what she had. That was so humbling to hear her say. She also wished to bring us ornaments and gifts for the next time we visited. They are poor, they do not have much at all, yet she wanted to bless us with everything that she could. I was speechless.

We ended church with greeting all of the Kenyans and taking group photos. Many of the children were scared to death of the white people, while other children loved playing with us. I am still so amazed by how much God was present in that room. The spirit of God surrounds us EVERYWHERE. That was very apparent today. At one point the pastor was praying and he continued to get louder and lower to the ground, until he was on his knees shouting before the Lord. Just imagine if churches in America had that passion. What would happen if we brought that fire to America?

We ate lunch in a random field far away from the people and then we headed to the village of TuTu to be apart of the church crusade. The children are so loving. Upon arrival i had many hands touching and seeking after me. There were 5 preachers there to talk to the village people, plus all of the people on our team. They shared the gospel and the worship team led in song and dance. The children are so respectful during all of this. They were so quiet, patient and modest, such a difference from American kids. One little girl, Hannah held on to me the entire time we were there. She was very shy, but made it known she was not letting go of me for anything. I made sure to tell as many children that i could that God loved them (Mungu anakupenda) and also, that I loved them. It was so cool to talk to them in my broken swahili. I did a very poor job, but i managed to hold conversations.

Earlier today, I kept feeling bad because I wasn't sad. I always that coming to Kenya would be emotional and make me feel very sad and depressed, but being here has brought me such joy. I feel bad that these people lack education and health care, but as far as im concerned, they are better off than us when it comes to joy and happiness.

Day 3 (sorry it's all taking so long!!)

Well, Emily Anna and I got very restless nights of sleep and of course our alarm didnt go off, so we woke up with 10 minutes to get ready, get packed and leave for Segera. We made it, but we were cutting it close! The land is beautiful here. I love Africa so far. On the bus ride we turned a lot of heads. One man that was driving beside us kept speeding up and asking for my number, which then turned to him giving me his number on a sheet of paper through the window of the bus. The children love to wave to us using both hands, they smile and they shout to the white people.

The journey to Segera took about 4 hours, but it went by so fast because all of us were so busy site seeing. Arriving to Ereri School was very overwhelming. There were so many children lined up to wave and greet us. The teenage girls and older woman were greeting us with song and as soon as we stepped of our bus there were hands grabbing us from all around. The people performed a welcome ceremony with song, dancing and a tour. The Kenyans pulled us into the dancing, I was the first to get pulled out there and we all celebrated our arrival. The children were the ones to show us around their school. Annah grabbed my hand and didnt let go until i was leaving. These people amaze me with their love and joy that they show for others and the pride that they have in their school is unbelievable. The children LOVED playing with our cameras and all of the people were so amazed that i could speak Swahili. I would say to them in swahili that i knew a small amount of swahili and they would run around repeating my words to all their friends and telling everyone that i could speak it. Annah kept repeating to me "Mzungu ninampenda" which means "white person, i love you" I have never felt so loved until i came here.

It is so cool to come to another country and see the works of the same God in America being done in Africa. It blows my mind how big and awesome He is. One of our 410 Bridge leaders, Andrew spoke to us tonight and encouraged us to focus on friendships this week. We are not here to help them work and/or survive. They can handle that on their own. We are here to show God's love and to shine His light by building frisndhips and getting to know the Kenyans. You see, they can handle it all without us. They work harder, some of them pray harder and they live in a beautiful land without distractions like we have at home. Quite frankly, they live better lives than we do. Not easier lives, just overall better lives.

God is showing me so much on this trip. His beauty, His fullness, His purity, His love. He continues to reveal more about himself to me daily. I continue to pray for what He wants for my future. I could truly see myself calling Kenya home, but i will wait and be patient for the calling of the Lord.

Kenya Day 2- Just another day on a plane..

Well the flight from Chicago to Brussels was probably the most uncomfortable trip i have ever been on. To put in in perspective, taking 1 benedryl can normally knock me out for a LONGGG night, but on this plane ride, it did absolutely nothing. So, with a total of 30 minutes of sleep, we arrived in Brussels at 8:30am (2:30am our time). A one hour lay over gave us just enough time to get the entire team across the airport and to our gate. Now, I sit and write on our flight to Nairobi. Oh a wonderful 10 hour flight.. To start off the first hour, the Lord really encouraged me when reading 1 Thessalonians 1 and 2. I have also been reading Radical by David Platts. I'm only 2 chapters in and im SO challenged by the things im reading. When we choose to follow God, He deserves ALL of our life, not just bits and pieces. He literally wants EVERYTHING and in order to fully follow him, we must be willing to give up anything.

I have to say, God is literally rocking my world and im not even in Africa yet. As we were boarding the plane, everyone on our team got seperated and we were all dispersed throughout the airplane. A young man started walking towards me and in my head im thinking "well crap, he must be in the seat next to me." In all honesty I was really wanting to have the 2 seats to myself to attempt to get some sleep and not to mention, avoid the awkward flight conversation. Not too long after he sat down, the conversation started. So who are you? where are you from? why are you going to kenya? etc. Well, Ian is from Nairobi, him and his rugby team were flying back to school from the tournament they just played in Paris. He speaks swahili and taught me some new things and he helped me write a letter to give to Francis. We chatted the entire plane ride about everything, but we really got to talking about Christianity and the Bible. Quite frankly, this guy knows better english than any of us do and he knows wayy more about the Bible than i do. We talked about the Rapture and the Seven Seals. He also told me stories that they had heard relating to the Bible. All of it was just very intriguing. The flight ended up being very enjoyable and im very glad i met all the Kenyan boys!

We are FINALLY in Nairobi. They plane landed, we checked through customs, exchanged our money, got our luggage and spotted Alfred. Alfred would be our 410 leader for the week. He met us right outside the airport, waving a sign and greeting us with a huge smile and a big thumbs up!! I cant even describe how i was feeling at that moment. On the bus ride to the hotel, i broke down. I am finally here, serving the Lord and tomorrow i would be on my way to Segera, heading to meet the people i have so longed to meet!! GOD IS GOOD!

i apologize for the fact that i am a horrible writer and changed tenses in this blog post about 1000 times. It will continue to happen and i will continue to apologize. You can see why i am not an english major..

Kenya Day 1

Well day 1 was quite uneventful. Planes, airports, and more planes. Lots of travel time, but good bonding time for a team i have to be spending the next 10 days with. Since i cant sleep on an airplane, travel has allowed for a lot of bonding time and a lot of Jesus time. On the first flight to Chicago, i did my quiet time. God definitely has perfect timing with things. In Colossians 4 Paul commands the church of Colossae to continue to pray and be watchful in Thanksgiving. He also commands them to walk in wisdom towards outsiders and to make the best use of time. Relating this passage to my life, I am leaving america to head to a very different place and to share the gospel with complete strangers. This trip is guaranteed to be full of many outsiders. I must walk in wisdom towards EACH one of them. Not just the Kenyans, but every person i come into contact with. I must not only apply this to my trip, but to my everyday life as well. I hope and pray that God will use me to share his gospel with not only the Kenyans but EVERY person i come in contact with from here on out. I want to make the BEST use of time and to make every person matter, because to God EVERY heart matters. 

There is so much anticipation for this trip and i cant wait to see what God has in store. 

Side note: Earlier in this flight i was sitting, drinking apple juice and watching glee. Molly Patton, you have rubbed off on me. 

Side note #2: it's really weird writing these as if i havent already experienced it, but im just going through and writing most of what was in my journal so bear with me!

Speechless

I started this blog last November to write about my trip to Kenya, which as many of you know was postponed because my mom was in the hospital. (i'll update on her later on) In 2 days from now i will FINALLY be on a plane to Kenya. It's still sinking in that this is actually happening. I have all my stuff together, im packing it all up this afternoon and Thursday morning, I'll be on my way. I look back to November and being very bitter and angry that I could not go to Kenya, but as the Lord has taught me over these past few months, HIS timing is much better than mine and He has a specific reason for me to be on this trip and not the trip that took place in November. I do not have words for how excited I am. I am praying for God to reveal His plan for my life while I'm there. I currently feel called to do medical missions in Africa, but I am praying for God to confirm His plans for my life. We have two teams on the trip, one team will be working in the schools with the children and the other team will be digging a trench from one school to the other that allows water to flow from the schools. Please keep all of us in your prayers for safe travel and life change. Also, be praying for the life of the Kenyans. There will be many opportunities for these people to hear the Gospel. Please pray for life change in the Kenyans and that we will leave an impact on their life.

I am not taking my computer to Kenya, but i will be writing about my experience once i get back.

Now, onto my mom. I never thought I would look at her and Mark and be happy with the situation my family is living in, but it's getting there. My family is starting to embrace Mark and love Mark, because thats what the Lord has commanded us to do to others. My mom's health is very good. She looks good and relationships are definitely being repaired. It has been a very long journey to get to this point and a very rough journey, but totally worth the outcome. Continue to be praying for them, things are not perfect, nor will they ever be, but they are heading in that direction.

Thanks to everyone for the prayer and support my family has been shown through everything and thank you for the many prayers I have received in regards to my trip. I cannot wait to come back with many stories to share!

No time on my hands!!

I have so much to blog about, but i NEVER have time anymore. Hopefully i'll be able to catch up sometime tomorrow.

I had my YoungLife interview last week and i got the call yesterday that i will officially be a YoungLife leader TOMORROW!! I am seriously so excited. i could not fall asleep last night just thinking about how blessed i am. Last summer, I went to camp with my YoungLife group from home and the Lord used that week to radically change my life. I was not living for him in my senior year of high school and when everything started to fall downhill with my mom, I continued to run from Him. After that week in Colorado, my relationship with Jesus has not been the same. He has seriously made some major changes in my life, He has given me a purpose for my life and He has changed my views on a lot of people in the last few weeks. It has been totally awesome to see how the Lord has worked in my life this year. I AM SO BLESSED. The Lord used YoungLife to radically change me and now i get an opportunity to be apart of this ministry. AHH words cannot describe my excitement.

I still have lots to tell about my mom, Mark and everything that has been going on lately. Really good things, not bad at all. The Lord has been changing my heart and the hearts of others in my family and i cannot wait to share with everyone what has been going on!

also, random fact about my life, i have started running a lot more lately and i will be running in the Cooper river bridge run this saturday! im super stoked that i can actually run 6 miles. NEVER ever thought that would happen..

Quick thought before studying and bed..

I love seeing how God has absolutely transformed me, but i what makes me even more in awe of Him, is seeing Him work through other people. It is so awesome. My God is Huge. I love it.

also, please keep praying for me and my family, God has the power to heal and transform everything. I will not underestimate Him.

We're not always suppose to understand.

Some things we're just not suppose to understand. I currently don't know why things have to happen like this. Why does addiction have to effect everyone? why does it have to continue to happen? why cant things change? and most importantly why does all this happen to me and joe? I don't have answers, nor do i think i will ever have answers. things may continue to spiral downwards or there may be a change in heart. I don't know. At this point in my life, i wish i could run. i wish i could run far away and pretend that everything in my life was perfect, but since its not, nor will it ever be, I must make the best of things. The Lord is teaching me a lot through everything going on. 


1. The more dependent I am upon Him, the stronger our relationship becomes. In complete honesty there are some days when i look at my life and just ask God why. some days i don't want to read my Bible and some days im frustrated, but then i think back on the time when He wasn't my main focus in life. Senior year of high school when everything started getting worse with mommy I really turned my back on God, i didn't want anything to do with church and my heart became hard towards Him. I ran. I fed my selfish desires and I was broken. My life didn't make sense, I had no purpose, i just felt lost. I don't want that ever again. I love knowing that my Father loves me and having that comfort. Nothing compares to it. Because of the situation with my mom and not having an earthly father, many times i really don't feel loved, but He gives that to me and He offers a greater love than anyone could ever offer. 


2. I am not in control of my life, He is. I don't have the ability to change what's going on. the sin in my moms life causes her to fall, the irresponsibility in her life causes her to suffer, which causes me and my family hurt and pain. I cant change that, but He has the power to. I can't focus on things that I can't change, surrendering it to him allows me freedom. It allows me to not stress and to feel some sort of relief.


3. Just thinking about the future, I WILL be an awesome parent. nothing is going to come in the way of the relationship i will have with my children. not work, not any circumstances going on in my life, nothing. I will pray with them, i will take them to church and I will teach them about my Father who has led me through everything.


4. Do not let your pride get in the way of healing. If you have a problem, seek help. Don't be ashamed of it, confide in someone and seek help. If you don't, your problem will continue to get worse. Have accountability, but NOT someone struggling with the same problem. Also keep in mind, things don't get better over night. 

• "Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions." Romans 6:12
• "For sin will have NO dominion over you, since you are not under law but under GRACE. Romans 6: 14 He sets us free of sin, dont let it control you.

5. My God is Powerful. He is great. He is mighty. He is love. He is awesome. He is amazing. I could not live my life without Him.

"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

Romans 5: 3-5

Dont miss out on an opportunity to live your life for Him. Its worth it. Dont live your life broken. His love is greater than anything imaginable and the plans He offers for your life unimaginable. 
Dont let your circumstances ruin your life. 


Check this out --> This and This

long time no talk

It has been quite a while since i've blogged and I have to say i've missed it. unfortunately with finals, Christmas and all the other things going on, my life was just too hectic to even sit down and think about blogging. My Christmas break was amazing. seriously, i am SOOO blessed with an awesome group of friends and i thank God for them daily. To have friends that love Jesus and shine His light every where they go is such a blessing. I love you all and thank you so much for being apart of my life. I am also very very blessed with my family.

This might be off topic, but i feel like i really need to write it. God's really been pressing on my heart with forgiveness and with all the has been going on with my family in the past few months, it really applies to my life. I have been holding anger and bitterness towards a few people and God has really made me struggle with that. For those who may be apart of my family or for those who know the situation, you know it is easy to have anger towards someone. For some you may hold anger towards my mom and for some you may hold anger towards Mark. We have a Savior who left Heaven, left His perfect place, to come to our level, to a place where perfect doesn't exist. to a place where temptation, pain and suffering do exist. He did this to save me and you from our sins. What we struggle to realize is that every sin is equal to another. When we sin, God doesn't care whether we commit murder or if we lie to our parents, He loves us the SAME. What God has been forcing me to apply to my life is that since my sin is equal to the sin of my mom and Mark, who am i to hold those sins against them? I can no longer hold anger and bitterness towards them because I am forgiven for all of the stupid things i do. This may not apply to you with my family situation, but it could apply to something in your life. Im here to tell you, forgiveness is powerful.